This is hilarious... :lol: :lol: :lol:
There was a blonde, a brunette and a redhead who were all news reporters going to iraq.
One day the 3 of them got captured by a group of terrorists and were going to be executed the next day.
The terrorists put the redhead first in the middle of a circle of men with lots of guns. Scared as hell she thought I have a perfect idea. The commander said "ready...aim..." then the redhead blurts out "tornado tornado tornado!" They all scattered out and she ran away.
They come back aput put the brunette in the circle. "Ready...aim..." With quick thinking she blurts out "earthquake earthquake earthquake!" They all scattered and she got away.
The terrorists return once more and put the blonde in the circle. "Ready... aim..." The blonde, seeing the other reporters schemes, says, "fire fire fire."
There are two friends; Bob and Fred. Bob is a blonde and Fred is a brunette. Bob and Fred go into a bar one day, and they see an Indian walk in. The bartender says to them, "I'd give anyone $100,000 if they could bring me an Indian's head. Those Indians killed my children, they killed my wife, and they destroyed my home." So, Bob and Fred decide to go out, find an Indian, and chop off its head to bring to the bartender. The two friends go out looking, and find an Indian. Fred throws a rock and hits the Indian in the head, and it falls unconcious down into a canyon. Bob and Fred go down into the canyon to cut off the Indian's head when Fred taps Bob's shoulder and says with a horrified expression, "Bob, look." Bob turns around, and sees Indians surrounding them at the top of the canyon. Then he shouts, "Yes!! We're going to be millionares!"
Two Blonde men were in the woods hunting. One looked at the
other and said, "I've got to take a crap."
The other said, "Well go behind one of those big trees, and
The first one said, "But I don't have any paper to wipe my butt."
The other blonde replied, "You have a dollar, don't you?"
The first one said, "Yeah, I've got a dollar. That's a great
idea-- I'll use that!"
He left and came back with crap all over his hands and clothes.
His friend looked at him and asked, "What happened
The first one replied, "Have you ever tried to wipe your butt
with 3 quarters, 2 dimes, and a nickel?"
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] '86 F150... 521 w/ FRPP SCJ Heads, Glide...
Best ET: 1/8---6.17 @ 112 mph N/A @ 1200'
6.34 @ 112 mph N/A @ 5000'
1/4---9.73 @ 136 mph N/A @ 1200'
9.97 @ 135 mph N/A @ 5000'