THE TRUE MAN TEST!!!! - 460 Ford Forum
Chilly's Garage A place for non-460 banter.

User Tag List

 
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
post #1 of 6 (permalink) Old 06-05-2009, 09:13 AM Thread Starter
Senior Member
 
1984Boss351's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Helena Mt.
Posts: 268
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
 
Send a message via Yahoo to 1984Boss351
Talking THE TRUE MAN TEST!!!!

MAN TEST

1.. If you are over forty, and you have a
washboard stomach, you are a queer. It means you haven't sucked back enough
beer with the boys and have spent the rest of your free time doing sit-ups,
aerobics, and doing the Oprah diet...Faggot.



2. If you have a cat, you are a homo. A cat is like a dog, but queer-- it
grooms itself constantly but never scratches itself, has a delicate touch
except when it uses its claws, and whines to be fed. And just
think about how you call a dog... 'Killer, come here! I said get your ***
over here, Killer!' Now think about how you call a cat...'Bun-bun, come to
daddy, snookums!' Jeeez you're so queer.



3. If you suck on lollipops, Ring-Pops, baby pacifiers, or any such
nonsense, rest assured, you are a Gaylord. A straight man only sucks on BBQ
ribs, crab claws, raw oysters, lobster backs, pickled pigs feet, or tits.
Anything else and you are a Homo in training and undeniably a fag.



4. If you refuse to take a dump in a public bathroom or piss in a parking
lot, you crave a deep homosexual relationship. A man's world is his toilet;
he defecates and urinates where he pleases.



5. If you drink anything other than regular coffee, you're as fairy as
Tinkerbelle. A straight man will never be heard ordering a 'Decaf Soy
Latte'. If you've put a Decaf Soy Latte to your lips, you've had a man
there too.



6. If you know more than six names of non-standard colours or four
different types of dessert other than ice cream and custard, you might as
well be handing out free *** passes. A real man doesn't have memory space
in his brain to remember all of that crap. If you can pick out chartreuse
you're gay. And if you can name ANY type of textile other than cotton or
denim, you are a peter puffer.



7. If you drive with both hands on the wheel, forget it, you're dying to
tune a meat whistle. A man only puts both hands on the wheel to honk at a
slow-assed driver or to cut the ***** off. The rest of the time he needs
that hand to change the radio station, eat a hamburger, or hold his beer.



8. If you do not send this off to all the males on your email list because
you are afraid of hurting their feelings then you are definitely on the
verge of being a salami smuggler.

Ideas are just that! Ideas!
Let "NO-ONE" influence your decissions!
Don't try to be someone your not!
1984Boss351 is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #2 of 6 (permalink) Old 06-05-2009, 09:26 AM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Smith Mountain Lake, VA
Posts: 355
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
 
LMAO !! Now thats some Funny **** right there !!
RapidRuss is offline  
post #3 of 6 (permalink) Old 06-05-2009, 11:05 AM
Senior Member
 
ThndrChkn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Helena,Montana
Posts: 3,195
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
 
I got that in am email a couple weeks ago... That's hilarious...




Doug...






[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] '86 F150... 521 w/ FRPP SCJ Heads, Glide...
Best ET: 1/8---6.17 @ 112 mph N/A @ 1200'
6.34 @ 112 mph N/A @ 5000'
1/4---9.73 @ 136 mph N/A @ 1200'
9.97 @ 135 mph N/A @ 5000'
ThndrChkn is offline  
 
post #4 of 6 (permalink) Old 06-05-2009, 02:08 PM
 
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 7
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
 
thats probably the funniest thing ive seen all week!
slo_5.0 is offline  
post #5 of 6 (permalink) Old 06-05-2009, 03:00 PM
Senior Member
 
77mud's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Stella NC
Posts: 2,268
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
 
Yea I found that the other day to but it was still funny to read it again

'he never hit the brakes and he was shifting gears'

Larry (SLIM)

77 F-150 BB on 38.5's
77mud is offline  
post #6 of 6 (permalink) Old 06-05-2009, 03:08 PM
Forum Contributor
 
nuclearcobra's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Delaware Coast
Posts: 1,334
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
 
Well im over 40 and have a washboard stomach its just not divided into sections its one big square well round kinda square i guess and i drive with two hands on the wheel sometimes when i'm doing a giant wheel stand and i'm too scared to let go and shift

84 hatch scj headed 472" on 10" tires
nuclearcobra is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on the 460 Ford Forum forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in










Thread Tools Search this Thread
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes
Linear Mode Linear Mode



Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome