A guy gets pulled for speeding,The smartass cop asks for his id and smuggly asks" what are you? a racing driver?". The guy replies " No officer, I'm a rectum stretcher!" "What's that?" asks the cop, The guy replies " i get a rectum and I insert 1 finger and then another, I have a wiggle around and then insert 3 then 4 fingers. Then I get both hands in and pull and stretch until it's 6ft wide". The cop then ask's "What the hell do you do with a 6ft arsehole?". The guy replies "Give it a uniform and a speed gun! "