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3,195 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
These are "actual" call center conversations: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Man, some people just shouldn't be allowed out in the world... :roll:

Customer: "I've been calling 700-1000 for two days and can't get through; can you help?"
Operator: "Where did you get that number, sir?"
Customer: "It's on the door of your business."
Operator: "Sir, those are the hours that we are open."
:shock: :shock:

Samsung Electronics:
Caller: "Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?"
Operator: "I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about."
Caller: "On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?"
Operator: "I think it means the telephone plug on the wall."
:shock: :shock:

RAC Motoring Services:
Caller: "Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am traveling in Australia?"
Operator: "Does the product name give you a clue?"
:shock: :shock:

Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while traveling in Europe):

"If I register my car in France, and then take it to England, do I have to change the steering wheel to the other side of the car?" :shock: :lol:

Directory Enquiries:
Caller: "I'd like the number of the Argo Fish Bar, please"
Operator: "I'm sorry, there's no listing. Are you sure that the spelling is correct?"
Caller: "Well, it used to be called the Bargo Fish Bar but the 'B' fell off."
:roll: :lol:

Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven:

Operator: "Woven? Are you sure?"
Caller: "Yes. That's what it says on the label -- Woven in Scotland." :shock: :shock:

On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a worried operator:

"I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the number on. :roll: :lol:

Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
Customer: "OK."
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"
Customer: "Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."
:shock: :lol: :lol:

Tech Support: "OK. At the bottom left hand side of your screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"
Customer: "Wow! How can you see my screen from there?"
:shock: :shock:

Caller: "I deleted a file from my PC last week and I just realized that I need it. So, if I turn my system clock back two weeks will I get my file back again?" :? :?

This has to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the WordPerfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for "Termination without Cause."

Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee.
(Now I know why they record these conversations!):

Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?"
Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
Operator: "Went away?"
Caller: "They disappeared."
Operator: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
Caller: "Nothing."
Operator: "Nothing??"
Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
Caller: "How do I tell?"
Operator: "Can you see the 'C: prompt' on the screen??"
Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
Caller: "There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"
Caller: "What's a monitor?"
Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??"
Caller: "I don't know."
Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"
Caller: "Yes, I think so."
Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
Caller: "Yes, it is."
Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
Caller: "Okay, here it is."
Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
Caller: "I can't reach."
Operator: "OK. Well, can you see if it is??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??"
Caller: "Well, it's not because I don't have the right angle -- it's because it's dark."
Operator: "Dark??"
Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."
Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then."
Caller: "I can't."
Operator: "No? Why not??"
Caller: "Because there's a power failure."
Operator: "A power .... A power failure? Aha. Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff that your computer came in??"
Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
Operator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."
Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?"
Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??"
Operator: "Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer!!!"
:shock: :shock: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Premium Member
3,225 Posts
I can't stand stupid people. :( :( :(

708 Posts
I worked in a call center similar to these for seven years....the horror...the horror...

All joking aside, yeah- there are a lot of stupid people out there. Sure are.

There's also a lot of extremely busy people who don't have the time to fully understand & comprehend ridiculously large owners' manuals.....

which are made so, because the manufacturers have to print items such as, "Do NOT handle power cord with wet hands." "Electricity can be dangerous." "Do not insert metal objects into the VCR cassette door." "The coffee maker may be hot- handle with care." A few stupid people, a few more greedy people, and a lot of greedy lawyers are responsible for this. :roll:

As a final note, EVERYBODY is "stupid" in their own way. You might be surprised at how many doctors, commercial pilots, scientists, etc. are not able to program their VCR, though they may well be competent in their fields of work. :)

Bet y'all can't guess which state has the most difficult callers..... :wink:

3,195 Posts
Discussion Starter #8
YYYUP!!! That's how it is... :roll: BUT.... They're the one's that called you :wink:

Doug... 8)

269 Posts
I don't want to hijack this thread.....
But why is it that I put something funny up here in Chillys Garage about 12 hours ago, and it gets removed within an hour or two, when all these other jokes etc can remain?
I could see nothing wrong with what I did, and there was no explanation why it was deleted. I'm assuming that Jones did it, but why?

3,195 Posts
Discussion Starter #10
Good question... I never saw it, what was it?

Doug... 8)

269 Posts
I'll leave the answer to those that removed it.

I did not feel it was offensive to anyone, but simply a little bit of light hearted humour. If it was, I apologize. That's the only reason I can see that it was removed.
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